It is 11:09 PM. Owen went to bed about 8:00. He has already been up twice.
I really don't understand how letting him cry when we put him to bed will make him stop waking up 500 times a night. Can someone explain this??
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
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Well, there are two camps of parents on this issue. I am from the camp that doesn't do "cry it out" with infants. (That is another story with older toddlers/preschoolers.) I highly suggest this book to my students:
The No Cry Sleep Solution By: Elizabeth Pantley
The truth is that most HUMANS do not sleep through the night. Don't adults wake up to change positions or use the restroom? Well, babies wake also but they need help going back to sleep. I have found that my kids go through stages where they do sleep through the night, then a stage where they wake frequently.
As they say, this too shall pass. Keeping you in my prayers girl! Let me know if you'd like some links to baby sleeping articles.
I recommend "Sleeping Through the Night" by Jodi Mindell Ph.D. This book explains the importance of teaching your child how to fall asleep on their own and how to fall back asleep on their own when they wake up in the middle of the night. The nice thing about this book is you can choose the amount of crying you think is realistic for your child. My personal opinion is that whatever approach you use is fine, but you MUST do something now. Thinking that Owen will one day just learn to not need you is not realistic. In fact, the longer this goes on the more you are teaching him he does need his mommy in order to go back to sleep. I know it is so hard, but before you know it you'll be so glad you did something about it.
To add to the slough of recommendations, I'm in the Happy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child camp. We went through a phase with Aurelia for a few weeks where she had to cry it out. I'd go in, in 15 minutes to burp her, comfort her and put her down again. Then I'd wait 20 minutes before repeating it, 25 minutes, etc. Eventually, she figured it out. We had repeat this for several days and we've had a few relapses, but when she goes to sleep at 7, she generally stays that way. I think the catch is knowing there's a difference between the "in pain" cry of bad gas, or air in the tummy, or teething and the "I'm so tired I can't handle life anymore and I need somebody to do something for me" cry.
It really does sound like he can't make it through more than one or two sleep-cycles without waking. You poor thing! That's got to be so exhausting.
You know, I wonder if there might be a link between Owen's eating and his sleeping? Maybe he's so overtired that he's not really hungry?
In any case, you're his mom and you'll do the best you can for him and that's all you can do!
They cry it out. Again, it doesn't mean you let Owen cry for a straight hour, but you can let him cry for 5 minutes and then go in and comfort him and make sure he's dry and fed and put him back down. If he cries again, you wait 10 minutes and do the same thing. Cries again, wait 15. They begin to realize that no one is going to rush in just because they cry. And then they stop crying and start sleeping. That was our experience with Harry.
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